Week 3--Sunday--"Quit Being Self-Defeating"

Ahhh, this is an interesting pick..."Quit Being Self-Defeating."  This week's card shows a Non-Smoking symbol with three examples of self-defeating behaviors:  smoking, nail-biting, and staying up late.  The back side of the card reads,

"What do you do that is self-defeating?  Is it a smoking habit?  A nail-biting fixation?  Perhaps it's just that you mumble instead of speaking up, and then say 'nothing' when asked to repeat what you said.  Maybe you blow up at your friends over little things.  Whatever it is, you know what it is.  What can you realistically change?  Do you really want to change?  Is there anything you can do that would allow you to feel happier and more empowered?  Find support among your friends or from community resources to help you maintain your commitment to stop a self-defeating habit."

So here's my thinking...If I have a self-defeating habit, then perhaps I weaken my ability to "make a difference?"  Reasonable?  We'll go with that.  I asked my husband for his qualitative analysis of my self-defeating behaviors and lo his response: "You don't have many self-defeating behaviors; I think your self-defeating behaviors are that you beat yourself up emotionally & mentally...feeling guilty too."  So I probed a bit further; how many times a week do I say something negative about myself--and what about?  He pauses, looks at me and says, "I would guess about twice a day...and usually about your body shape." 

BURN.  He's right though; what do I do about it?  Well, if I stop talking about it during the next seven days, that's good--not saying it aloud has benefits; however, it's not enough to cease speaking it aloud.  I need to cease thinking it to myself.